Sabbath 9: links to Tripp's post, Meeegan's post
Yes, I know this is two sabbath posts in one day. I started my response to Sabbath 8 a week ago, but didn't quite finish the thought. So I started doing the next week's exercise while simultaneously juggling the other things in my world and waiting for time to write again.
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Muller belabors a point in this chapter, namely that all things have a natural circadian rhythm. We're hardwired to need rest. well, duh. Anybody who has pulled an all-nighter studying/doing homework/playing computer games and experienced the inevitable subsequent crash landing afterward knows that you can't go without sleep forever. Not even for small values of forever.
He then goes on to talk about how animals can and do find their way without maps and GPS receivers, and almost seem to listen to songs of the earth we can't hear to orient their lives, followed by a nice segue to the suggested exercise for the week, which is simply to meditate on your own breath.
Or, as we said in seminary, "just breathe, baby."
It's a simple exercise, common to many religious traditions. Get comfortable somewhere, preferably quiet to begin with. (we had to take the ticking clock off the wall for this exercise at first.) Clear your mind as best you can. Now concentrate on your breath. Feel the muscles. Feel your ribcage move. When (not if) your thoughts intrude, notice them, let them go for now, and return to the breath.
This is a wonderful exercise. If you've never tried it, five minutes a day for a week will work wonders. If you're doing this by yourself, you might want to set a timer of some kind, even if it makes you feel a bit like a boiled egg. The point is to not think about what time it is and how long you've been breathing. Don't count breaths. Just breathe.
A personal story about breathing:
Almost all third-year students at Episcopal seminaries are required by their dioceses to take the GOEs, which stands for General Ordination Exams (or God's Own Exam). It's a week of comprehensive essay exams, and seems to comprise equal parts of examination, fraternity hazing, and rite of passage (because many third-year students effectively coast it in after the exam). It's stressful, because students are facing a big honkin' exam at the end of at least a five-year process, and this is pretty much the last place where anybody might say "well, maybe you shouldn't be a priest/deacon after all."
On the first day of the exams when I took them, our chapel leader that Monday morning was the liturgics professor. He read to us from the Bible, and then looked up and said, "remember to breathe. Every year, some time about Wednesday, some of you come to me in a panic, and it's almost always true that you're forgotten to breathe."
And doggone it if I didn't find myself forgetting to breathe. And then I would laugh at myself, and take a few deep breaths, and relax, and get back to it.
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8 comments:
For those of us not familiar with the Episcopal ordination process, I'm a little confused: you mention being a third-year student, but are at the end of a five-year process?
On a separate note, I've been enjoying reading Meeegan's blog (thanks for the link). I've noticed she has been a frequent poster to your site and have wondered how you met. I've had fun getting to *know* her through her amusing and well written posts. It seems we have much in common.
Hugs, meg
It's a three-year degree at normal speed, but that's just seminary. The ordination process, from the day you meet with your senior pastor or bishop to the day the church makes you a priest, is at least four years, and I've heard as many as eight or ten.
I met Megan (not "MAY-gan" as with most people who use that spelling) in graduate school. It was the dance team that bumped us into each other (literally), but we became friends for reasons that have nothing to do with dancing.
She's on the short list of people who can call me and say "drop what you're doing and get on a plane and come here, I need you" and I'd do just that.
How did you feel about your GOE's, Cristopher? I hope you did well and, more importantly, maintained your sanity!
Tripp, you have the dubious honor of being the first (and likely only) person, other than my classmates and my bishop, who asked what I actually scored on the thing.
When you're searching for a pastor's position, vestries of congregations don't even know how many seminaries there are, much less the differences between them, unless they have an insider in their number. Nobody, but nobody, asks what you scored. Funny, then, that we stress so much over the exam.
The conversation with my bishop was just about this short:
C: Hello, Bishop. Have you looked at my GOE results yet?
BR: no, not yet.
C: Oh, okay. I got 3's and 4's.
BR: good, good.
C: Do you want to call me when you read them...?
BR: no, that won't be necessary. Now, while you're on the phone...
The exam is scored 1-5, with 5 being a "publication quality" answer, 3 being "adequate," 2 as "incomplete," and 1 being "did you actually read the question?"
It's scored by a board of readers, which adds the occasional moment of randomness to the scoring. Case in point: we had a guy in my class who was a natural at pastoral care and counseling. He was so good in CPE that the hospital hired him as a chaplain during the following school year. I think he got a 1 on the pastoral care section. (My classmates all responded with variations on four-letter expressions of disbelief.)
a follow-up comment: I'm sure you already knew most of that, but I got on a roll and started answering Meg instead of you. oops.
I felt good after finishing the exams. Felt like I'd actually learned something, and like I just might do better than fall flat on my face in the parish. My seminary was not a particularly encouraging place, and I was in the middle of a nationwide job search, so my confidence needed a boost at that point.
I also took the advice of many previous test-takers: take the evenings off. Go to the movies. it's too late to study. Breathe. :-) I was wrung out at the end of the week, but more from the intense concentration than from the stress.
I am glad you did well on them. I served as chaplain all three years at Seabury. I was the lone Baptist, so I had to help my ECUSA friends through the slag.
well, now I feel even sillier for explaining the exam. Forgot that's where you went to school. doh!
Ha! No problem. Oh, I just posted the ninth installment. I am all caught up now.
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